Moving Forward

I haven't posted for a couple of weeks, mainly because I've been having a difficult time with my fibro.  The old addage, "If you can't say something nice...." ha.   But also, I haven't had internet.  Our internet will come up for 5 minutes then go down again!  Lame.  A change is a comin'.  I saw my Dr. this week and he changed one of my medications so I am hoping there will be better days ahead. The new med is making me sleepy though, so I'm hoping that will stop soon.  Lame.  Staying positive though!!

I had a playdate with my 3 year old grandson Korbyn last week

and so it was naptime and as we were laying on "mimi's bed" and watching Shrek Christmas Cartoon (yes it is June) for the 47th time--the things we do for our grandchildren :0) He layed his little head right on top of mine with his face right on my cheek.  I didn't want to move... EVER.  What a sweet moment.  So many things ran through my mind, how fleeting the moments are in our lives. If I had declined the opportunity to have the playdate because I didn't feel well, I would have missed out on this moment! I know in just a few short years he will be too old to be coming to playdates with Mimi, he will be off with his friends.  I'm so thankful to have this time with him.  I wish so much I could spend this one-on-one time with my other grandkids.  His little sister is due to be born any day now. I hope I will have the same chance with her to have playdates and special moments.

My mom always made my children and her other grandchildren feel special.  She actually had a birthday party for the Cabbage Patch dolls she bought her three granddaughters for Christmas.  She sent them all invitations to the party and then had the party as if it were for a real person.  It was awesome.  Those girls are all grown now and two of them have children of their own and they are still talking about that party.  I want to be that kind of grandmother. 

Life hands us some crumby stuff sometimes but it is how we choose to handle what we are faced with.  Live each day as if it is your last, be the person you want your family to remember you as, don't sweat the small stuff.  You never know when a golden moment will happen, when you might be cheek to cheek with your grandchild, just for a moment.

on the bright side.....

So I know my memory hasn't been the best in the last year or so... so much so that my family gets a pretty good laugh about it quite often. I was reading about Fibromyalgia and discovered this is one of the symptoms!  Yay!  It isn't my fault and I'm not just getting old!

On the Bright Side, I can rewatch an entire television series and not remember a thing about it so it is like watching it for the first time!!! Ha ha ha.  Seriously, I've been rewatching Lost and it has made me chuckle as I am so engrossed in it I wonder "what is going to happen next???" and then I laugh and realize I've seen this whole thing before you know!  I know my daughter is reading this laughing out loud at me.  I am reminded of those exciting moments when we were actually watching this great series for the first time and the minute it would go to commercial one of us would be calling the other on the phone asking "did you catch this," or "did you see that?"  We were total "Losties" and it was so much fun.  I remember my husband thinking we were crazy (he wasn't a real fan) but even at that time I knew these were golden moments that would never come again. I don't think we ever got through an entire episode without calling each other at least twice.  Ah the memories.

remembering moments

I grew up in a tiny town in Arizona called Eagar.  It is on the far eastern border near the New Mexico state line about in the middle of the state.  I have happy memories of my childhood and my husband and I lived there the first 10 years of our marriage when our children were born and while they were little.  I was lucky to have my two older brothers live there as well.  We all lived within a mile of each other with my parents as well.  It was a wonderful time for all of us. We moved to Utah in 1990.  We went up there the last time we were home.

I'm being nostalgic because right now our beautiful mountains are on fire and we are losing so much of them.  Our surrounding towns are in danger.  It is really scary. http://www.cnn.com/2011/US/06/05/arizona.wildfires/index.html

I think back on all the time we spent on these mountains, the special moments my children spent with my dad camping, building "forts" and the time spent with their uncles and aunts as well.  We had family reunions, family campouts, easter egg hunts and picnics.  My kids still talk about these precious moments with fond memories.  We lost my father to cancer in 1994 so it is heart wrenching to see his mountain home in flames.  He was born and raised in these mountains.  He saw the world change from the transportation of horses to space shuttles. My mom tells me they had to fight to save the old log cabin he lived in as a boy from this devistating fire.  Some of my favorite memories as a child are going up there with him and hearing the stories of his childhood.  This log home is where my parents' love story began as well.  It means everything to me.

It just drives home that we need to remember to cherish every moment, and every memory. My dad spent every minute he could with his grandkids and my husband is doing the same.  It doesn't matter what they are doing, just spending time, that's what is important.  I took this picture when we went to Las Vegas for Thanksgiving.  It thought it showed a precious moment between my husband and our grandson, just looking out the window at the vegas lights.

Sweet Moments

I cherish the moments with my granchildren. I'm blessed to have 6 and 1 on the way, however only 1 (and the 1 on the way) live close to me.  I love spending 1 on 1 time with him.  Memorial Day we got to take him to see Thomas the Train in person and it was so much fun!

What they say is true, "if I had known how much fun grandkids would be I would have had them first!" They love us unconditionally. On the days that are the hardest, when it feels like I'm struggling to find my way and wondering if I can find the good days again, I just have to look into his eyes and hear him say "I need you mimi" and I melt.  It's all worth it.  Never give up, cherish those moments that you are given and hang on to the memories when you are having a hard time.